Friday, March 30, 2007

March 28, 2007 - What a Day!

Besides being involved in an accident, I guess one thing a driver dreads is going to the workshop to have the car fixed and not having the car for a few days! ok ok..another is of course footing the bill for the damage. This is what happened to me right now as I type away in this particular blog. My car was banged 2 days ago! It was stationary and parked right outside my students' house when it got knocked by a teenager trying to reverse his car out from his porch! Damn! Damn! Damn! Not to mention, a "P" driver!

Well, I wasn't that mad having seen the damage done by the accident, but what got me on my nerve was the fact that this fellow actually denied the whole thing! Thankgoodness my students' mother was at the balcony of her house and she witnessed the whole incident. The fellow actually had the cheek to say, "I didnt do it. It merely went past your car when I reversed mine." (note that there were a few scratches on his Kia Sephia and he still had the cheek to say he didnt do it) It didnt help that my car was already dented before this. I admit that it was not in a perfect condition (hence his denial) but to have my signal light broken by him and not admitting it really blew my top away! So there I was trying to get into his mind and bear the responsiblity of his mistake and all I got was "Why dont you talk to my parents!" And I said Ok...

"So where are your parents?"

"My mom will be home after 7."

So what else could I do except to wait for the return of the 'hero' mother? Anyway, I finally met up with her at her house and she directly told me to make a police report and claim the damages from her insurance company. I wouldnt say that she's not taking responsibility for her son's mistake .....but the damage is considered small and I dont think a police report is necessary lor.

"I know my son. This is not the first time he scratched the car. In fact, I wanna teach him a lesson. I'm asking him to make the police report himself tomorrow and he shall have his merit points deducted, considering him being a "P" driver. He's feeling very miserable right now."

Well, I was speechless. It's kinda good in a way to teach your son a lesson, but look here, you are also putting me into a troublesome situation to go all the way to the police station just to make a report on the small damage...just because you want to teach your son a freaking lesson!

To cut the story short, I managed to persuade her to settle the whole thing without the need to make police reports and compensate me on the damage done. So we agreed to spilt the bil into half, considering I already have some dents on my car previously. He just aggravated it and not to mention nicely broke my ever-trusting signal light!

Then there I was, in the workshop, leaving my baby for repair. The quotation - RM380 to fix the bumper with paint spray and replace the signal light.
So, as promised, I called up Mrs Chua (ya, 'hero's' mother) and told her the cost of repair for my car.

THE damages... *note the deepened dent right below the light (pic 2) and of course the broken light (pic 3) not to mention the extra scratches too...yes, thanks to the 'hero'*

*Phone conversation*

"Well, as you know, your car was already dented before my son hit it. So, I think it's only fair that you fork out more for the repair"


"But I thought you have agreed to foot half of the bill?"

"Ya, but according to my son, he didnt make such a big damage to your car."

"Well, Mrs Chua, I dont blame you for believing your son. And I'm honest enough to let you know that my car was already dented before your son banged it. But seriously, the signal light was indeed damaged by him. Not to mention the extra and deeper dent he left on my bumper."

"Ya, I know. But your car is not a new car. So it's not fair that I have to foot the bill for a brand new light. Ok la. Let's make this simple, I'll pay RM150 for your damage. Settle? You know I have have faced a lot of problems lately with my maid running away and me forking extra money to hire a new one." (*she has told me a long story about how my students' maid 'stole' her maid and that he maid ran away. Thank again to my students' maid. Well, that's another long story altogether. Pening nya kepala I*)

"Ya, I understand Mrs Chua, But you have to understand that your problem of your maid running away has got nothing to do with me. And it's only RM40 extra if you were to just agree to foot half of the RM380 bill."

"Ok la ok la. Let's not take drag this issue any longer. RM160. I'm also into some financial constraints you know. Ok? Furthermore, I didnt really get to see clearly the damage on your car because it was already dark last night when we met."
*like it's my fault that she couldnt see clearly in the dark...duh!*

"Well, what can I say. OK la. If you really need to see the damage, I have taken some pictures from my phone and I'll show it to u once I bring you the receipt and collect the payment from you when my car is ready."

*Phone conversation ends*

Did I mention that these people live in a semi-detached house in a gated and guarded community in Kota Kemuning? RM40 also she wants to bargain with me. I felt like as if I was in the pasar malam trying to get a good bargain for my groceries!

Sigh sigh sigh....people you meet in this world.

Well, looks like I have to fork out extra of what I expected earlier for my car.......

...another insight of my life...adios

Monday, March 26, 2007

Pregnant, wedding, pregnant, wedding

Everyone around me is either getting pregnant or married this year.....Guess it's a good year to welcome a new addition into a family heh? baby/wife/husband/daughter in law/ son in law... ..etc...Now let's see my list of frens who are expecting changes in their lives.....

1. Samantha is due in May
2. Karen is due in August
3. Jacelyn is due in September
4. Sister in law is due in November

1. Ben's wedding in May
2. Brother in law and Cheryl's wedding in July (that's 2 different wedding)
3. Kristy's wedding in November

That's the info I've got so far. Am sure more to come.....

So with all the huss about people I'm closed with being pregnant especially, hubby is itching and giving me hints of trying for another baby this year. He said he'd love to have a daughter (if God permits) and as for me, I've always wanted to have a daughter. Guess, it's just a mother's wish to have at least a daughter in her life. Anyway, those close to me would know by now how my first pregnancy went. It was indeed a roller coaster ride when I had Zach ( I dont mean the morning/night sickness...more to that and it's got to do with genetic hiccups and all...long story tho..anyway, it turned out fine at the end and Zach came to this world as how we hoped he'd be) Well, the thought of going through that again really gives me the goosebumps. Trust me, no mothers deserve to go through such turmoil especially when she's most vulnerable during her pregnancy. It's not something anyone would wanna go through. Nevertheless, the thought of giving Zach another sibling is much more meaningful. Thus, my agreement to try for another one. Hopefully, (like the Muslim say, Insyaallah) I will be pregnant by end of this year and welcome a Rat baby next year. Hopefully with God's grace and mercy, I'll have a better and smoother pregnancy this time around.
Wish me luck....

...another piece of my mind. Adios...

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Housewives DO work!

I was reading the papers the other day about a male journalist writing about how his expectation to become a househusband turned out to be a total opposite. You see, this writer wrote about his experience as a househusband caring for his young daughter who is autistic. That's beside the point. What is amusing about his article is that he was expecting to have a few hours of "ME" time a day, considering he is not working anymore but it turned out to be the exact opposite. He was in fact busier than he was in office and finally understood the fact that why most housewives always say that they are busier than working mothers! And to add in to his amusing piece, he even mentioned that he despised the sarcastic question poised to him and annoys most housewives - "What do you do all day?" It's a total slap in the face for most housewives as if to claim that "You seem to have nothing to do and you have all day to yourself!" and "You dont work. So what do you do most of the time?" Excuse me...may I beg to differ?!

Now let me state some thoughts from my mind. I've been a housewife for the past 3 years and still am. It was not a decision I made; in fact it was somehow made for me. I found out that I was pregnant after I left my last job and was in search for better opportunity. As a matter of fact, I was looking forward to starting a new career life when I noticed that my period was late and hence, pregnant! During my first month of pregnancy, I received a call from HP (Hewlett Packard) offering me a lucrative job as a Communication Executive. As much as I wanted to accept the job offer, I had to tell them the truth about my pregnancy, knowing very clearly that I might not get the job the minute I made the revelation. True enough, I never received any call from them after that. And then I had to hold back my plans to continue working until my baby is born. Then came another Philipino maid gave me a hell of a problem and then one problem after another......I was and still am stuck as a housewife. All for the sake of my son. I'm into part-time teaching now though. Ok, again...that's besides the point of my post this time.

What I'm annoyed, as I'm sure many other housewives are too is that people tend to have a stereotypical opinion that being a housewife is a bliss and that one should not complain being one. Ok, I'm not saying that I'm complaining but we, housewives are not as free as many people think we are. In fact, we work 24/7 and there is not such thing as a public holiday in our calendar. I often received remarks like;

"You are not working wat. You should be able to do this and that."

"You busy? You must be joking cos you are not working for goodness sake."

"Not free? What do you do all day (since you are not working)?"

"No time? But you are not working."

Excuse me......we might not be working as how others do in their offices.....but we DO work alright.......I mean...don't these people ever think that we housewives hold many jobs/positions at a same time? Look...we are:

1. Caregiver to our kids
2. HR manager cum supervisor - to our maids, who sometimes really give us a heck of a problem and have us breathe through fire in our lungs and throat!
3. Chef cum dietitian cum menu planner
4. Laundry manager - otherwise we'd have to kiss goodbye to our clothes should they land in the hands of the maid
5. Financial manager - bills, bills, bills...(though we might not be the one who earn the $$$..but still.....)
6. Production machine - it's easy to say but we are the ones who have to go through the agony of delivering babies.....dont get me wrong....ALL mother (working ones included) go through this as well.....
7. Story teller cum movie maker cum clown....entertainer of the house.
8. Wet 'marketeer' - it's not easy knowing what to buy from the butcher, fish monger, vege/fruit sellers..not to mention bargaining for the best price and ensuring that we are not being cheated.
9. Fashion consultant cum personal shopper cum bargain hunter
10. Etc. Etc. Etc...the list goes on and on....

Not too long ago the Women and Family Development Ministry suggested that housewives be given salaries for their roles in the families. I welcome the suggestion although it might be tough for certain families to abide by it. Well, come to think of it......a housewife's salary can never be measured and we can never come out with a proper figure to fill in the blanks for SALARY:____________. Another suggestion reckoned that husbands whose wives are housewives should contribute some EPF into their wives' account for their unlimited contributions to the family and subsequently give her a sense of financial security when she reaches the retiring age. Again, this is indeed an applaudable suggestion. But how many husbands in our society would actually carry out this move? I have to admit that some actually do. For example my beloved husband. And I'm really thankful that I have such an understanding husband who never seems to take me for granted although I'm not the one who brings in money into the family. But to have a peace of mind at work for beloved hubby, knowing that THE wife is at home watching over the safety of beloved son - PRICELESS!

Well, I'm not saying that my role in the family should be acknowledged but I just cant stand those remarks from insensitive people who undermine the roles of a housewife. Sometimes, it's not just the remarks which irk me...but certain obvious actions do show their insensitive presumptions on us. What I want these people to know is that please...please show some respect to us housewives. We are not trying to gauge any recognition...just bear in mind that being a housewife is not as easy as most people might think. Just compare a kid who goes to the babysitter and a kid who's brought up by his own mother. I dont have to elaborate further......BIG difference.

Sigh...I can never find an ending to this particular post cos there is just so much to write about. But I guess I'll have to end it somehow otherwise this post might never be published.

....another piece of my mind....adios